Every good gay boy knows anal requires lubrication, but did you know that the slippery
stuff helps keep the condom from breaking? OutUK's Wes Ferguson gets slippy
with it and tried his hand at all those lube jobs.
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Truth be told,
the right lube can be a versatile and pleasure enhancing product. Either with a
partner or flying solo, it's always a good idea to have a little lube on hand.
That said; imagine the sincere effort it took to hide my horrified expression when a
friend recently confided he masturbated without using any lubricant.
"You don't even spit on it?" I heard my own voice ask quizzically. Apparently, no.
I was too preoccupied in my own head to catch his exact reply, only pretending to
pay attention while I refrained from shouting, "Man, I hope your dick doesn’t get
red and raw!"
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It's not the strangest anecdote about the intricacies of personal pleasure I’ve heard.
Not by far. The award for most unique disclosure belongs to a confidential source I’ll
call "my flatmate." He suggests egg whites as an inconspicuous alternative to lube
and swears the consistency is suitable for such purposes. I don't recommend it, but
feel there’s a certain level of creativity and improvisation involved which deserves
credit. I wasn’t compelled to inquire how he discovered this newfangled if not somewhat
disturbing information, and can only assume guys everywhere are whacking away with an
expansive variety of household emollients.
Our female contemporaries clearly have the advantage in the area of self-lubrication,
but all my girlfriends know it’s a complete misconception to presume they don’t need
or won’t benefit from using lube. Those wonderful vibrating toys don’t grease themselves,
you know. Remember; oil-based lubricants shouldn’t be used with sex toys, unless they’re
crafted out of hard plastic or solid glass. Next time, don’t reach for that old jar of
Vaseline in the nightstand. You’ll be doing all parties and/or equipment involved a
big favour.
Vaseline is, of course, the most commonly identified alternative sex ointment. Cooking fats like butter and Crisco
come in at a close second, and often causes severe skin irritation. I simply do not know why anyone
would choose to use thick mineral oil or greasy cooking ingredients as common substitutes for
lubricant. It's difficult to imagine being so utterly unprepared for a sexual encounter, especially with
myself.
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Suffice it to say, items found scattered around your domicile or in the office kitchen are
poor imitations compared to sensual lotions and creams available. If you really are of a culinary bent
then a better alternative is
Boy Butter which make a great fist of spreading on toys.
MOST IMPORTANTLY-- a vast majority of these pitch-hitters contain natural oils and cannot be used with latex condoms,
with the exception of egg whites.
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I’d still advise staying clear of the latter, unless you and your partner have a fetish for raw
chicken embryos. I’m cool with whatever turns you on. However, I am likely to pass on any
pastry served at your place.
Once, a great divide existed between the two types of personal lubricants on the market.
Condom compatible, water-based products such as original K-Y were known for drying and becoming tacky, like
glue. Some manufacturers, like the makers of Astroglide, created ultra-sleek formulas
that remain popular today. This product and many other water-based lubes contain glycerine, which
can cause irritation (and may contribute to yeast infections in some women).
On the other side of the equation, oil-based lotions conduct body heat and retain a slick quality,
but also breakdown latex. This can lead to a rather unfortunate experience trying to fish out a
busted condom. Though great for massage or a game of naked twister, they are never recommended for
safer-sex play (hands and other areas should be washed before putting on a condom). There
are but a few of these products bold enough to market themselves for the J/O crowd,
but you'll rarely find them because they're not condom safe.
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Interestingly, a vast majority of condoms sold in the US and Europe have used a completely different
lubricant in their packaging for almost a century. It wasn’t until the mid-nineties, when a group
in Germany introduced Eros, that this high-grade silicone product became available to the public.
Word spread quickly; similar versions followed just as fast. Eros - the original & still the
best, is now called
Pjur Eros BodyGlide for legal reasons, although most major brands favour comparably.
Wet Platinum is a bit thicker, while
ID Millennium looses slip but has a powder soft finish – making
this formula an excellent massage lotion and personal lube.
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Going beyond the sensation of touch alone, you’ll find many flavored lubricants that can lead
to some edible delights. Almost all of which are condom compatible, water-based, and generally
contain some type of sugar additive. As for any product you might apply to your genitals, it’s
a good idea do a spot test for allergies at least 24-48 hours before putting it down there.
Beware, some lower grade novelty items compare to the taste of a cardboard smoothie. Others,
like Wet, have led the industry, continually reformulating their flavoured line into a now stainless
clear gel that warms to enhance sexual activity.
Wet Flavoured Lubricants come in an array of yummy
flavours, each individually encased in a hand-moulded bottle for easy grip or a great little pack of samples.
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While something can be said for getting more bang your buck, some other products with
'added features' cause some suspicions to arise. ID added L-Arginine to its ingredient list and crossed over into new territory
with
ID Pleasure Sensual Lubricant. I know, huh? The product claims you'll 'feel the tingle' - but do you want your privates
to tingle? False advertisements dominate this industry because of taboos associated with
sex (just check your email for the latest penis enlargement technique). Misinformation
spreads on a global scale, find reliable sources to get your information. Research
indicates L-Arginine isn’t effective when used topically.
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Until I started looking around, I didn’t know much about it either. Here are a
few notes. WHAT IT IS: A nonessential amino acid (the body can produce it on its own).
Seminal fluid in Males contains up to 80% of this protein building block. Some experts
believe the decrease of production in the body later in life is responsible for
degenerative processes related to aging. HOW IT WORKS: Dilates and engorges the blood
vessels, assisting in sexual arousal by elevating the supply of nitric oxide in the body,
resulting in increased sexual functions [including erectile function]. There are other
health-related benefits attributed to this compound, including improved blood flow,
reduced plaque build-up, and lower cholesterol. Considered an illegal drug in
some countries.
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Finally, we come to one of the most popular sexual enhancements: Desensitizing Creams like
Boi Toy.
The common ingredient is benzocaine, a topical anesthetic that numbs wherever
applied. Since this non-prescription medication is mainly used to relieve pain and/or
itching caused by minor burns, cuts and scratches, it can discreetly double in your
first-aid kit when travelling. As with all things medicinal, there are mild warnings
about allergic reaction, and of course benzocaine is for external use only.
Don’t eat it.
Before closing, I urge you to try some of the fabulous products I’ve suggested above,
but keep an open mind if you don’t quite find what you’re looking for. Remember that
lube choice isn’t a matter of right or wrong. There’s an entire world of selection,
diverse consistency, texture, slip, and duration, all of which contribute to the
overall feel. I generally recommend going with your own personal preference, unless
you beat off with egg whites.
Check out all these products in
the OutUK online store. Products are
sent in one business day in discreet packaging by Royal Mail Recorded Delivery.
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