Tie me tight and tease my tits! Now that BDSM play is becoming more and more mainstream OutUK has sent its very own hard man Adrian Gillan for some training at a BDSM "discovery night" for novice knotters and trainee tweakers.
The guy in uniform at the door greets me with a broad smile and then slaps a name badge onto my left pec: Ouch! An apt start, I thought, as I squeeze past a portly suited chap with bad B.O. and scurry across to the bar to down a few stiff ones.

So far, so good: not too packed and it's camp as they come, almost civilised in fact - quite a sherry party. Some are in uniform but most, like me, are new to this SM lark, not least to tonight's theme: bondage. A few master-slave combos clank around but it's mainly singles nervously circulating, scouting the bare-brick industrial space under these Vauxhall arches: a two-roomed, two-tiered mish-mash of grills and mesh with scattered demo areas where hardened SMers stand poised to bind and probe.

As numbers build, clusters form around these hurtful hubs. One tattooed guy has had himself chained to a wire grill, masked and then soundly nipple tweaked to convulsion. Meanwhile his dick is levered out and sundry onlookers grope, with the SM Gays staffer on guard taking questions from the floor.
Crrrrack! My attention is led upstairs to a bench where an elderly guy in school uniform is being restrained and a queue has already formed to do the honours with assorted paddles, whips and straps. I bump into my large, smelly man again, gazing down at me, flexing a cane invitingly: "Would you like to be flogged? You can leave your pants on if you like to avoid the sting."

I politely decline: "My skin is very sensitive and marks easily."

He persists: "Would you cane me then?"

Not without enthusiasm, I agree and we retreat to a remote corner. He removes his sweaty jacket and hands me the rod: "Don't hold back." I coil and unleash.
"Harder," rasps a muffled voice in agony. "Harder, much harder."

I'm the one wincing, though soon into the swing of things. He stands upright: "How many was that in all? Twenty lashes? Enjoy that? Think I'll take a rest now but want another twenty in half an hour. Bye."

Off he hobbles.

Another demo across the way has several guys straight-jacketed, masked and bound to posts with their nads dangling through thongs and straps.

No mask could quite veil their age and weight, though I find myself attracted to one young-seeming slim lad sporting a PVC canine mask whose ear flaps are poppered down over the eye holes so he can't see a thing, which is his kick - being at the mercy of anonymous strangers, save for the ever-watchful eye of the omnipresent SM Gays volunteers.

I fondle and squeeze his cock as he writhes and pushes up against my hand.

All the while I'm staring into his muzzle of a mask, with mouth zip open and fastener tag hanging down the side like dribble, mesmerised - grotesque, comic and sinister at once. I see a dog's head, an idiot's glare and now a listless randy youth and trip off on my fantasy and power.

But the main attraction, around which this entire underworld spins is the eponymous "Hoist", centre-stage: a chain pulley slung over two floors where subs queue up like boys at a fair to be strapped into a full-body leather mummy-like coffin casket number and get winched above the assembled crowd where - immobile and swinging - genitals and arse are goaded by stretched out hands through gaping zips.

SM is all about trust, you can't give your body and its most intimate functions up to someone you don't trust
SM pleasure can be derived from the physical (pain and endorphins) or the mental (fantasy and role play), or both. SM activity still constitutes an illegal assault if it imparts marks or injuries that can be considered as more than "transient and trifling", regardless of consent a particularly juicy love bite could therefore technically be illegal.
Common sense - apparently it's not so common! But certainly never get tied up by an unidentifiable stranger, and know some basic first aid
The passive partner should agree a cut-off password or adopt the green ("go for it"), amber ("proceed with caution"), red ("bloody well stop") system
With masks ensure air passages are aligned and unhindered, use poppers with caution and never leave your slave unattended
Powder your rubber with talc to start; like condoms, never use an oil-based lube; beware sharp buckles; after use, wash with mild detergent and towel dry - never use your tumbler - and avoid metal hangers
During bondage watch out for panic, numbness, blueness, fainting and tingling, or chaffing, bleeding and burns; remember - metal chains can nip; always have round-ended scissors or keys to hand; try out those knots somewhere first and keep them simple, especially if on your own; never get tied up by unidentifiable strangers or tie anything around a neck
When flogging - never hit the spine, eyes, head, neck, kidneys, hands or genitals; know how to hit your mark; practice on a pillow; remember - a moving target is harder to hit, so no larking about and watch the drink; hit target with just the tip of the lash, not the full length; pay particular attention to hygiene, notably should cuts occur.

So what did I "discover" tonight?

The SM scene is civilised, responsible and friendly, not rough and risky; I'm personally more into SM role-play than the actually giving and taking of pain; and these monthly themed sessions are the perfect way to try things out and test your limits safely.

So come on boys, loose them chains!

Our online store www.ShopGay.nl stocks a wide range of paddles, whips and other BDSM gear.

SM Gays are a non-profit social and educational group who help gay guys have safe, consensual, sexual SM. Their popular, themed "Discovery Nights" are held every third Thursday of the month at The Hoist, Arch 47c, South Lambeth Road, Vauxhall, London SW8, from 8pm until late. Those new to the SM scene are particularly welcome and there is no dress code. Further details, hot tips and a full list of hanky codes at www.smgays.org

 

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