SPEAKING OF POSITIONS

But if you want to change positions, you need not have the yoga-like ability to suck yourself off - just a yen to explore a few new twists. Playing with positioning can make it easier to expertly fuck and/or suck, as well as perk up the dominance/submission aspects of sex. And, as we all know, variety is the spice of sex.

When it comes to anal sex, the top is usually, well, on top; most bottoms tend to like the submissive feeling of being slammed into from above. And sometimes tradition is best. "I really prefer old-fashioned face-to-face fucking," says one fellow. "That way I can look into the other guy's eyes and kiss him. Guess I'm just a romantic, huh?" But doggy-style, with the bottom on all fours and the top blasting into his butt from behind, is a perennial favorite with bottomboys who enjoy feeling used.

Straddling a lying-back partner and riding his erection gives a fuckee more control, a definite plus for guys who are tight or who are new to getting screwed. And there are other benefits to the position, especially when done face-to-face. "There's nothing that feels better," says another anal sex fan, "than leaning way back when I'm sitting on a hard-on. It hits my prostate gland just right."

From-the-rear approaches can also persuade a reluctant sphincter to let go, and there are a Kama Sutra's worth of other possible penetration positions, offering ample opportunity for orgasmic joy and an occasional leg cramp.

Of course, sexuality isn't just about poles and holes. Exploring each other's bodies can introduce men to a panoply of new pleasures. As one fella who's into feet confides, "When I screw someone, I like him to be on his back, with his legs in the air. That way I can get his feet near my face, where I can lick and play with them. Even a bottom who's never done foot play before can really get off on that - almost as much as I do."

And then there's the even kinkier stuff. The gentle art of bondage is largely positional, even if the tied-up guy in question is rendered motionless by the expert application of ropes or a roll of plastic wrap. Do you like the idea of a spread-eagled man in your bed, his erection reaching ceiling-ward? Find a willing victim and a skein of clothesline, and mold flesh and sinew to your will. Go ahead - you know you want to, you pervert, you.

That's not to say that every positional experiment ends in erotic success. Pornographic pretzeling can result in clumsiness, discomfort, even falling off the bed. But getting locked in an erotic rut can be even more disastrous. So find yourself a willing partner or three and see what variations you can cook up. Sex is, after all, dancing with dicks, so why not try out a few new steps?

Simon Sheppard

Now here's your chance to meet the man behind this column. OutUK has an interview with Simon Sheppard or you can take a look at some of his books that are currently available:

       

Looking for something very sexy and just as smart? Man on Man collects the best and hottest gay sex writing by Simon, who is also co-editor of Rough Stuff: Tales of Gay Men, Sex, and Power as well as a collection of gay erotica called Hotter Than Hell.

In KINKORAMA : Dispatches from the Front Lines of Perversion he takes readers behind the unmarked doors and black vinyl curtains that lead to the sometimes shocking, often hilarious, relentlessly arousing scenarios of extreme sex. There are also stories of bears in Tales from the Bear Cult: Beat Bear Stories from the Best Magazines.