This Week - Starting out, Staying clean and Becoming an escort

Gayboy starts with this: Me and my boyfriend have been talking about sleeping with each other but we haven't done it before! Have you got any tips on gay sex, and what we should start with?

James says: Hi there, well I guess most guys base their relationships on sex so the fact that you have a boyfriend but haven't slept with each other is quite unusual in the gay world.

I assume when you say sleep with each other you mean have sex and not just sleep in the same bed which can be also be very nice! When you first have sex with a guy you should both make sure you know what you want to do. It is normal to be nervous the first time so try and relax and enjoy it and try not to expect too much as it can take time to get used to things.

Kissing and sucking each other are great ways of starting. Anal sex can be more tricky and sometimes it doesn't always go the way you expect. If you do have anal sex then make sure you take time to be ready - play with your partners ass and finger him with lube to make him more relaxed and used to something being inside him. Start slowly and if it hurts stop and relax and then try again.

You don't have to rush it and the more time you take then the easier and more enjoyable it is. Also don't be embarrassed to discuss it and say how you feel. It is a process of getting used to what you like and enjoy. If you do have anal sex then make it safe by always using a condom and also use loads of lube as that helps a lot as well. But above all, talk to one another and take your time!

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Mateusz cleans up with this question: I am 18 years old and I wonder how guys clean their anus before having sex. I have read about an enema and using a shower but is having an enema every day safe? Is better to do that with clean water or with water and salt? How I can I do it in my home without buying "anal shower" or things like that? Are there any other ways to be always clean?

James replies: To clean yourself before anal sex you really do need to douche properly. You can either use a small handheld one which holds the water and you squirt it inside using the tube or you can use an attachment on the shower designed for this. You should always use luke warm water and you don't need to add salt to it - just use water. You can also buy enemas which contain water and you then squirt this inside you.

It can feel strange at first and it is something you need to get used to. What you need to do is squirt the water inside and then hold it and move it around and then go to the toilet and make sure all the water is out. You should do this a few times until the water comes out clean. Don't worry if the first time doesn't go that well as it does take a bit of practice to get used to! You can of course always practice this at a time when you aren't likely to have sex, just so you get used to the douching.

You can get both types of douches from ShopGay our online store.

One of the best ways to help you be clean for anal sex is to have a good diet, good exercise, drink lots of water and avoid too much alcohol, drugs and spicy food!

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Craig wants to know: I just love sex, and seem to be really good at it. I was thinking I should make it my career, and wondered how to become an escort. Where do you get clients from, and how to you make sure you are physically kept safe? What else do I need to know?

James answers: Hi Craig, a lot of guys work as escorts and it does help to love sex if you are planning to work as an escort. Being an escort can be a great way to make some money from having sex especially if you really enjoy it.

If you are worried about being safe then there are 2 aspects to that. Firstly make sure you are always sexually safe so even if guys offer you more money to have sex without a condom you don't!

Secondly if you have a client booked then always tell a friend that someone is coming. If you are going to their place then tell him where you are going and call him as soon as you leave so he knows you are ok. It is sometimes easier to hook up with another escort for all this as you can help each other.

Clients are nowadays mostly found online on chat sites or through advertising your escort profile on escort listing sites such as rentboy.com or sleepyboy.com - these are the biggest escort sites around. Rentboy has a lot of clients from the US and sleepy boy has more UK based clients. You can also advertise in magazines as well. In the UK Gay Times has an escort section and is nationwide and then there are local magazines such as Boyz and QX in London that you can also advertise in.

Try an ad for a week or a month and see if you get any work from it and then see if you want to continue. You can also ask your clients where they saw your ad to check how successful it is.

Finding an escort as a friend is also a cool idea as it is likely to be someone who has experience and he can give you some good advice and help you when you are starting out so you avoid making mistakes!

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